mitochondrionion:

jontronshat:

pajama-zam:

jontronshat:

imhangingwhataboutyou:

jontronshat:

“I heard my wife knock on the bathroom door, but then I remembered…. our bathroom doesn’t have a door”

I’m sorry, but the confusion of why your bathroom doesn’t have a door far outweighs any feelings of horror this might evoke.

can’t afford door.. the horror here is the realities of life

So what fuck was your wife knocking on

this dick

It’s not even 4 words???

yourbigsisnissi:

dating is supposed to be empowering. it’s supposed to make you feel good. it should be about two people, enthusiastically wanting to get to know each other and spend time together. it’s supposed to make you feel good and add joy and fun to your life

if talking to/dealing with/dating/getting to know a person isn’t like that, it’s probably a waste of time

woodmeat:

tsunamiwavesurfing:

hot-tea-nanako:

tsunamiwavesurfing:

if her room messy that 🐱🐱🐱 is fire

What if my whole apartment is messy….

you dirty and needa do better

afk:

ok follow these simple steps:

1. pick up the trash
2. step outta ur house
3. open the trash can
4. step into the trash can

good now u r where u belong congrats!!!

take-a-dip-in-the-deadpool:

scarlettrose6797:

bubblycider:

Stills from the exceptional “acqua alta” (lit.“high water”), high tide in Venice 30/10/18

They all seem so chill about it

Venecians: Oooooooh Water! You goof!